My Husband Has Been Diagnosed With Prostate Cancer; What Does He Need Most From Me?

When you are informed that your husband or partner has prostate cancer, it can be a devastating blow to you and your husband. You and your husband need to take time to digest the information and then decide what the game plan will be. Your husband will need understanding and compassion from you most of all. You know what you are feeling about the news? Think for a minute what your husband is feeling. He may be thinking he is going to die at any time. Your husband will need reassurance, and you will need to manage your own emotions, so that you can be tolerant and try to understand your husband’s emotions.

Learn all you can about prostate cancer

Your husband may not know exactly what is going on with his body; it would be good if you could keep a journal of doctor appointments and any information that the doctor gives you about your husband. Don’t be afraid to ask your doctor to talk to you in plain easy to understand terms. Ask for literature about prostate cancer, and do searches on the Internet to learn all that you can. You might want to keep a file box big enough to keep notebooks and papers you print off from the Internet, so that you can put your hands on them any time you need to.

Emotional support

Your husband will need you to be attentive to him. He may or may not want the rest of the family to know yet that he has prostate cancer. He may want to wait until he knows just how involved the cancer is. Try not to treat him any differently than normal. More than likely the prostate cancer isn’t going to be his cause of death. Most men live for a long time with prostate cancer, because it normally grows so slowly. If the prostate cancer hasn’t spread out from the prostate to the lymph nodes and to the organs of the body, it is likely that your husband will live a full life. Chances are he will die of something other than prostate cancer.

Support groups

It may be difficult to manage your emotions when you find out that your husband has prostate cancer. You and your husband could join the same group, or you could join separate groups. It may be very helpful talking to people who have already been through what you are going through right now. You can learn a lot from people who have dealt with prostate cancer.

State of mind

It is important that you and your husband keep your spirits up. You must believe that your husband will get well. It is easy to get depressed when you learn you have cancer. Depression can depress the immune system, so it is important to avoid depression. If your husband starts showing signs of depression, such as feeling like his condition is hopeless, he should see his doctor about this.

Communicate with the doctor

Your husband needs your support. You may be finding new information on the Internet about new treatments and cures for prostate cancer. Be sure to always discuss the things you read with your doctor. Try not to jump at a new treatment because you read about the studies, which are purported to have promising results. Many times studies are biased, and they are small. One or two studies might show promising results for new treatments, while other studies show that the treatment in question has no value at all.

Options

Your doctor may want to treat the prostate tumor right away or he/she may want to wait. Many times a doctor will elect to do nothing about prostate cancer, especially if it is slow growing that it isn’t doing anything. The doctor may just want to wait and watch the tumor and wait for it to get bigger before doing anything about it. Watchful waiting is the best option when the man is in already poor health. Going through surgery, radiation, chemotherapy, or doing nothing at all can be stressful for your husband. More than anything, your husband will need you to be his support system.

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